ahlul jannati. Ameen.


Sunday, 22 June 2014

Tuhan, Aku Sedang Nazak.

Malam itu,
Dia duduk sendirian,
Di atas hamparan sajadah,
Mata dipejam,
Menopang dagu,
Membawa dirinya ke arah lilitan koreksi,
Bertubi-tubi persoalan bagai das tembakan di bumi Syria,
Menghentak emosinya malam itu,
Satu menjadi kecai;

Sekiranya engkau mati hari ini,
Apa yang telah kau lakukan yang bisa membawamu ke Sorga?

Apakah kau telah pelihara hatimu,
Daripada najis-najis mainan dunia dan cinta manusia?

Engkau asyik sibuk dengan fesyen dan hiburan,
Apakah amalmu sudah cukup untuk membawa dirimu bertemu Tuhan?

Bagaimanakah engkau mahu menjawab pada Tuhan,
Bila disoal tentang bicaramu yang semakin sakit?

Apa engkau yakin,
Jika dunia ini hancur,
Engkau tergolong di kalangan mereka yang terpelihara?

Apa engkau fikir kau sudah cukup hebat,
Jika saudara-saudaramu yang lain sedang tenat?
Sedang tenggelam dalam nikmat dunia?

Jika engkau tahu engkau bakal ditarik rohnya esok hari,
Apa kau masih mahu berada di lekuk yang sama pada hari ini?

Kenapa engkau masih alpa?
Kenapa engkau masih tidak sadar bahawa Tuhan sedang berbicara denganmu?
Kenapa engkau masih lalai dengan segala fitnah dunia?

Kenapa engkau masih membenarkan yang salah?
Kenapa engkau masih sombong tidak mahu mencari Dia?
Kenapa engkau masih membiarkan kondisi hatimu sakit?
Kenapa engkau masih berteleku di lekuk yang sama sedang dunia kian nazak?

Engkau hidup tidak lama!
Kenapa engkau masih sombong,
Dan kenapa engkau semakin sombong?

Kenapa wahai diri....

Air matanya tewas,
Bagai empangan yang roboh,
Menenggelamkan Gunung Sahara,
Esak tangisnya semakin kuat,
Dia duduk sendirian,
Berbicara pada hatinya yang sedang sakit,

Aku sedang nazak,
Bawalah aku kearah-Mu.

Monday, 2 June 2014

Ramadhan and Change (See you soon!)

A few days more, we will be there in the holiest month in the Islamic calendar- a month in which the holy Quran was revealed. I am sure most of us are very excited, and we are exhilarated by the sense of doing good deeds. Though, some might be really nervous questioning if Allah still gives them the chances to beutify themselves in that month. Or, am I the only one who ought to feel that way? Please say nay. (/Awkward Smile/) I hope others feel the same thing. Lately I feel really anxious between death and Ramadhan- I am really worried if Izrail greets me first before Ramadhan 1435H does. This is so appaling because I am utterly not ready for death so I pray to Allah for your health, and my ownself. May we still have the chance(s) to greet Ramadhan, In sha Allah.

Well, if I looked back at my Ramadhan experiences (this year will be my 19th Ramadhan, if Allah wills it), I did not really paying attention to make sustainable changes. I just did the things that people generally do on Ramadhan without holistic understanding. I saw people went to the mosque and performed tarawih, so I decided to do so. I acknowledged that a few Makcik and Mama recited the Holy Quran in a group (tadarus), so I made up my mind to join that kind of occasion. I just learned the things that are happening around me without even perceive the intended meaning. I guess because of my attitudes which frequently immersed in the actions even without understanding, so at the end I just slipped back into my old routines. I am a weak person- Not gained any wisdom. All praise is due to Allah who has given me such respect in your eyes and has hid my humanly flaws and mistakes.


My educational history are not in the field of Islamic studies, I never went to Madrasah or any Islamic educational institution. Back then when I was sixteen, I got an offer from SBPI but I do not know where on earth this SBPI is- Never heard of it, never imagined to end my school session at that school. I never thought that I will be in that kind of environment- Where the muslimah quintessential covered her aurah, and I could be friends with students who learnt Arabics, Quran Sunnah etc (How finely Allah has created, I really have high expections for them).

Finally I got the fortuity to breath in Biah Solehah (islamic environment) even for only two years. Alhamdulillah I got the chances to spend my Ramadhan there when I was at my teen ages of 16 and 17 ( I was in technical science stream). At that stages, I realised that Ramadhan is the prime time to change. I hope He finds me as authentic as how I feel. It seemed to happen so sudden and drastic in the eyes of the public but trust me, it took time to open my eyes to feel this way.


Ramadhan is not about you went to bazaar and buy murtabak. Ramadhan is not about you being lazy in front of the computer and remain sluggish looking at the slow ticking of clock. Ramadhan is not only about you fasting at the day, and waiting till it is time to break the fast. Ramadhan is not about you went to Kamdar and buy new cloths for Hari Raya.

Ramadhan is the month of change.

Change. How ironically the word is, right? Change is being demanded by the masses deteriorating due to the concept of Malaysian taxes ie GST. Change is being chanted by the politicians by promising all sort of manifestos.

Change, is momentous indeed.

So, when we talk about Ramadhan- Have you ever wonder why we are able to fast throughout the month and perhaps attend tarawih most of the nights? We can easily give sadaqah and talking less? But after that month passed, the motivational balloons get deflated. Even waking up for fajr is really difficult. Bear in your mind, if those kind of circumstances happen to you, you are not changing for better. Ramadhan should be the month which dramatically alters our routines to be better after that month.

Yes. We should not be the slave of Ramadhan but we should make Ramadhan the month of 'change'. The real change- Which emphasized the internal change that transform us positively in many aspects for instances characters, attitudes, lifestyle, conversations and so on.

Ask yourself, how can you get that spirit back to make long lasting, sustainable changes in your life? I could not give you the answer, because I believe that although there are tips and advices that were given, nonetheless without your 'willingness', everything is becoming nought.

Try to make this Ramadhan different from our previous Ramadhan, try to make ourselves feel excited throughout the month like we are going on a date and after the month passed, please married with the good deeds you have did on that period- Make a change!

So, I've decided to stick with a few targets that I would like to achieve throughout the month and remain istiqamah the days ahead. One of the targets is- I will devoted myself more on memorizing rather than surfing the internet. Because I've realised that I spent so much time on internet and that turns me into a procrastinating person. With that, I would abstain myself from being online too long and cure my addiction to internet. I should ponder upon the real world out there and I need time to value myself more. In Sha Allah I would be of more help in the future. I think I should not wait for Ramadhan to start a new step, guess I better take a move starting from the moment I wrote this. 

Oh you who have believed, decreed upon you is fasting as it was decreed upon those before you that you may become righteous. |QURAN [2:183]

Pray for me,
Pray for the Ummah,
May Allah S.W.T safeguard us from the fitna of dunya.

Assalamualaikum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh.

Sunday, 1 June 2014


"Geng, jangan lupa bangun solat Subuh!"

*Status updated*

And then a few of his friends commented:

"La brader tak payah hipokrit, bukan kau selalu terbabas Subuh ke?"
"Haha kau ke ni Abu? Lain macam je."

Tarik nafas. 
Garu kepala yang tak ada kutu.


Mungkin ada yang meletakkan stigma- Seseorang yang selalu mengingatkan yang lain tentang kebaikan tetapi he's not really preaching what he said...Is a hypocrite.


Pertamanya, kita perlu sedar bahawa hanya Allah yang mempunyai autoriti melabel manusia itu dan ini. There are many different aspects and characteristics for someone to be called a full of hypocrisy. Kalau kita kaitkan dengan situasi di atas, keesokannya Abu terbabas Subuh. Does that make Abu a hypocrite? No. You know why? Sebab Abu dah berusaha untuk bangun awal, dia sudah bersungguh-sungguh untuk bangun awal tetapi terbabas juga. 


But if Abu keeps reminding people “Jangan lupa bangun Subuh esok.”,
The next day Abu tinggal solat Subuh dengan sengaja, and he doesn’t care, doesn’t feel guilty, and acting like he did the solat Subuh when people pray- Then he is getting closer to hypocrisy.

Ini lah sebabnya kita perlu jauhkan diri kita daripada melabel manusia itu dan ini, kerana secara keseluruhannya hal-hal begini berkait rapat dengan ‘niat’, and the only One who can know the intentions or ‘niat’ is Allah. Kita tidak akan pernah tahu apa amalan dan perkara yang dilakukan oleh seseorang itu, sangat rahsia. Rahsia dia dan Pencipta.

So if it is a good advice and they are reminding you what the right thing to do, then focus on the advice - not them. If you are trying to make them feel terrible about it because they are not following the same advices, it is not justifiable. Kadang-kadang kerana kita yang suka melabel dan mengkondem, telah membuatkan orang lain rasa bersalah dan mereka rasa terbeban untuk melakukan kebaikan. 

We will never know from which kind of circumstances they are going through.

So, please all we have to do is when we find such so called "hypocrites" atau labelan-labelan lain, atau kita pandang dia sebagai individu retorik atau baling batu sembunyi tangan- Just pray for them that may Allah swt make it easy for them to follow what they say or convey others. You can advise them too, just don't be judgmental in the process and let your ego or "pride" (of being more practicing) get in the way. Else, all your good deeds go to waste because of this single act of ego.

Dan kena beringat...

At the end of the day, we aren't going to be asked if the person who give us the reminder practiced what they preached. Rather we will be asked what we did about the reminder.

And Allah knows best. 

Sudah-sudahlah melabel manusia itu dan ini,
Kita bukan Tuhan,
Dan jauh benar daripada maksum.


If a Muslim tweets or post a status about Islam, 
Stop asssuming that they are claiming to be righteous. 
It's simply a reminder. 
Take it or leave it.